Bad at texting reddit. 24 votes, 22 comments. Scrolling through social media and leaving dumb comments requires less mental energy/effort than reading a text and figuring out how to respond. Ooh, got it. Probably not for 8 hours, and would send a message if I couldn't chat right then, but I also wouldn't want to get locked into texting back and forth with an SO for an extended period of time when I'm out with friends. true. I have girls send me snapchat everyday, initiate text, reply message, approach me at parties but still don't like me. People with adhd struggle often with procrastination and short term memory problems. Meanwhile they initiate conversations in a group text. No facial expressions or tone to establish context. A lot of women are looking for servants or men who will wait on them. Just look at your situation and decide whether you trust that this girl actually likes you and is actually just a shitty texter or if she is playing you. Being a bad texter does not mean that you have adhd. 30 years ago, texting wasn't a thing. I can tell u wat has helped me is get out, talk to people, stay social, let ur energy naturally flow, you'll see what belongs to you will naturally come. If someone is showing a lack of interest, or is ‘bad at texting’ or doesn’t respond for hours. I mean, if it happens once-the double text- ok, but if it’s an constant thing then you need more hobbies and you need to find someone else that wants to co The key for me is if they are just bad a responding to text or just dont find talking to you interesting. I feel like people who generally suck at texting put more into the time that you’re actually spending together and that is more important. You don't want to think of you as one of her girlfriends or texting buddies. then if they don’t reply for like 3 days you could send them another message, but don’t start assuming everything’s wrong or they don’t like you. In fact, I text less with the people who I consider really close friends because I feel like my relationship isn’t dependent on how often I talk with them. There’s nothing like totally stressing out or overreacting because you’ve conjured a billion scenarios in your head. In 2022, can someone who's in their 20s, be bad at texting? I totally accept if someone doesn't want to text me, but it hurts when they lie. It gives us something to talk about on our dates. The date went well but he’s really bad at texting (taking 8+ hours to reply) and really dry. Bruh I was doing same sht. 4. So, I just use texting to set up dates at first. Bad idea, I know from experience, and take it from me, it makes the pain hurt more, longer and your feelings to get back will intensify. com Nov 21, 2020 · Are they actually bad at texting or is it just an excuse? Here's how to identify a bad texter, and what "bad at texting" really means. But the people that I am still close with know me and know that it can be hard for me. It's weird because on some days, I'm not affected by his bad texting habits, but on other days it completely ruins my day and This is not bad texting, this is ideal texting. Texting is easier for me because I can take my time to respond to someone. Both my boyfriend and me are both equally horrible texters (my best friend is as well) but the time we spend together is extremely fulfilling. I really like this guy, but he's so bad at texting. I'm so over it at this point, if I want to text you, I'm gonna text you what I want, when I want and as much as I feel like… I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. I wouldn't enjoy feeling bad every single time my phone pinged and I didn't immediately drop everything to attend to it. I don’t see that as a bad thing personally. I'd like to think my interpretation of body language is far better than my texting sensibilities. +1. How are you. And on two/three occassions, he did not text me all day. If a woman wants to text me all day, it is a turnoff because I feel she doesn't have anything going on in her life. Some people are foreign and English may not be well enough to text comfortably. He'll read a message, think of a response, but forget to send it. Or Director level. When a guy consistently exhibited "bad texting" behavior, it almost always turned out he wasn't that interested. 2-if you can't meet up give her a call to change things up, she'll like hearing your voice more than reading a text. Do you mean bad at texting as in I misspell a lot of shit while texting or I'm just bad at responding to people in a timely fashion? I guess I'm bad at both. You should probably check how the other person reacts though, if they don’t text back or seem uninterested then maybe you should reconsider doing it again. I suggest you recalibrate your own expectations and find something else to fill free your time between dates. I will usually text a person first as a courtesy to make sure they got time for a phone call, but long text convos suck. That was my signal to just stop. So if you like texting all day, that is fine. But understand that a guy can be into you and just not want to text all day. For example on a reddit post on texting tips someone said this, “TEXTING DON'TS: Do not text her all day. I also don't respond quickly or often to texts. You cant go against your energy. Worrying about your texting habits excessively is going to drive yourself insane and make you anxious and inauthentic when you text others. yeah that’s what I was thinking but everywhere online people say don’t be texting buddies w girls and by giving her attention I will get friendzoned. Jul 26, 2017 · According to the men of Reddit, it depends. Dec 7, 2023 · A “bad texter” is someone who takes a long time to respond to texts, fails to continue a conversation via text message, only provides short or one word responses, or frequently ignores texts from others without explanation. If you're not and it does matter - ie you actually want to talk about it - I'll expect you to text me to say so; then I'll happily talk about it. From my experience, and all of my friends experiences, no one has ever gone from a backup text interest into a fullblown relationship, not ever. . when we hung out everything was fine and he left and things seemed okay, then a couple days later his responding got so… slow, and we talked on the phone abt it and he said “i don’t care or like you any less than i did before, i just don’t text much” 1, don’t put this on yourself. Even if my crush is texting me, I still get annoyed if I have to be forever on my phone texting her back. my bf is horrible at communication we’re long distance, 19f and 21m, and i’m huge on communication i always say how i feel. I ended up texting him Me : I know you get busy through the week and aren’t the best at texting but I feel like I hear from you so little it feels like our interest levels aren’t the same I know things between us have only recently moved to a more intimate level, but I know that seeing and hearing from you so infrequently now that we’ve crossed that threshold won’t be good for me mentally. As I get more comfortable around her, and know how our irl conversations go I am able to imagine our texts being irl conversations and then text what I would say if we were face to face. There are good texter, there are bad texter and everywhere in between, and know who your texting can change alot. So when I text people (particularly people I don't know very well but want to be friends with), I can take hours to days to respond to someone. I also HATE the multiple text waterfall people. Therefore, I assume most people probably don't go deep and worry about double texts unless it's excessive. i think it depends. To those with ADHD, this can be time/energy draining. They were just about to text you but got distracted by something and think they actually sent the text For people with ADHD, they have to stop everything they’re doing to text you. Instead, focus on being genuinely busy in life pursuing your own hobbies and goals, while interacting with people on the side. Can usually go on and on, but the fact that he does respond does show that interest is there. Texting is still bad but honestly if its meant to be it's going to work, if it doesnt work then there's probably nothing you could have done to change that fact anyway. Just asking him is your best bet. like if you ask something and the person hasn't responded its a lil cringe to keep texting and texting, but if you're like having a convo its okay to send a couple in a row like thats how the normal flow of conversation works it also DEFINITELY depends on the preexisting relationship level you have with that person. I’m not looking for less than 1 min response or him being constantly on his phone, but he took 15 hours to reply to message of confirming the time and location of our date which made me end up almost cancelling. This means if we don‘t want to answer right now (it probably won‘t give us de dopamine we crave haha), then we cannot bring ourselves to do it. DONT GET ME WRONG IF MY EX CALLS OR REACHES OUT TO ME ,I WOULD I’d hate to text with you lol I have a Cap Mercury and will almost always text within 3 min to 5 hours depending on what I’m doing. Tell her how you do things and make it a conversation. Do you talk on the phone? It’s so much better for building a relationship than texting a bunch. LEAVE THEM ALONE. So you text them, they text you, you text them etc. The way I see it if somebody got something important to say they can call me or find me. She's not afraid of initiating conversation or "double texting" so I think we're just bad at holding chats lmao. Most of all I want to stop feeling bad. Like is it too much to ask for a back and forth texting session? I have other friends but they're either married (and are even worse at responding to my messages) or they live 9272 miles away from me. I guess the rule of “tennis” is quite a good one to follow as a rough guide. People can have a bad time, or even a bad week and just not respond, but you also don't want to harass people. Just be cool. I don't want to be a bother and text him too much, but with the lack of messages, I can't help but feel like he's distancing himself. I just have a difficult time with the virtual kb on my phone I guess. I’ve been in the hospital. Some people have VERY busy lives or they just dont like the idea of texting being on their phone constantly which creates a plateau in the conversation. Might want to be sure she's not busy and can talk. Texting and real interactions are totally different and it is pretty normal. He warned me that he's bad at texting. ” Should I continue giving him the benefit of doubt and believe he’s just a bad texter and was in the hospital? She seems a lot different when we text, short 5-word responses. My SO is now travelling Asia and I know the most painful thing to do would be to text, or check out her social media posts. However, when I text I am not always have to have the same energy and fun ober a text message as I do in person. It's hard not to get in my own head with this. I would then just set a schedule of looking at your phone once every four hours or something, respond to what is in the text and ask some questions or talk about your day. I have also seen the opposite, people that are great with texting, but boring and uninteresting in real life. If someone can't stop themselves from freaking out or losing interest without constant written contact, I don't see how they'd be able to date me. Exception being if the conversation seems to be over and sending an OK or Yeah isn’t necessary. Texting is good for setting up dates and maybe some memes or banter, but not much else. But in real life, I love to have a lively conversation, to ask questions and overall have a good time. I think talking on the phone vs texting really sets a man apart from the rest in my opinion- it makes it clear you are interested in getting to know the other person. It takes a lot of effort and anxiety for me to talk to people in general. Communication via distance has become SO common place, that people really forget that WAY more people are fine with a brief phone call to say good morning/night, and to verify plans, than need a CONSTANT link to their potential partner. People didn't lose interest. If a guy isn't texting you back promptly and claims to be "bad at texting," chances are that he's not lying, he's just got something else going on. When I get a "double text", I really don't think about is this clingy/desperate etc. i am aware it’s a struggle for me (ADHD symptom or not) and always try my best. Texting is normal, but it depends on the type of person being recruited. UNLESS it's excessive like every other text "hello, did you read my last text kinda thing" etc. 3-If she's texting in a way you find weird, odd or bizarre tell her, be gentle about it. I think being honest with people about it is the best way to feel better about it and even make it easier to text back when you're ready. If you have no idea what happened, why do you blame yourself? 2, don’t assume. I also understand if someone's busy and can't text back soon. I could be putting so much effort and time into my texts and a guy might think I’m still a shitty texter and vice versa. It always hurts to say or hear, but when someone is truly interested, they will make time. I'm a dude who is horrible at texting, not only bc I hate it but also bc I never know how to text since I'm a more tonal person, im more of a 'hang in person' kind of guy. I try to talk about stuff she posts on social media and I try not to force a dying convo. You can take 30 sec to ask someone out for date and then not text again until confirming the day of date that plans haven’t changed. it helps the message stay on top so i see it even if it Coming from the other side (I’m a bad texter), what I can say is that how much I text someone in no way reflects how much I value my relationship with them. Phone calls every couple of days. Some may not know how to respond to a text at that moment, or want to be rude and text in front of others. For instance I know someone I was trying to become friends with as we seemingly have alot in common. See full list on elitedaily. I would also never text someone at the Sr. It's up to you whether that works for you or not, its very unlikely she'll change. i have close to 300 unread text messages. subjective: "for me, texting too much is a red flag because I'm not much of a texter and I'm afraid that dating that person would require me to change my natural proclivities" not subjective: "texting too much is a red flag because anyone who texts a lot is emotionally unstable" This OP is an example of the latter Lately I've started "warning" potential dates that I've been identified as a bad texter. After 2 years in the meat market, I am realizing texting mismatch is a major compatibility issue, and it's usually a power dynamic thing, where the person less invested in the relationship is the bad texter. Texting sucks. I would only text a candidate if they texted me first or asked me to do so as a preferred communication method. So like, I won't text saying "how are you today", because instinctively ill presume you're the same as you were yesterday - or you're not but it doesnt matter. Being bad at texting means I’m not going to message back and forth several times a day. I know people text each other just casually, but I feel like I always have to have something to say/tell them before I feel qualified to text them. Some may have phones that are annoying to text from. I’m not into tons of texting at all, and I honestly find it exhausting. Period. Everyone is different…what I consider bad texting, someone might consider great texting. Unless someone is on vacation, 2-3 weeks is ridiculous because then she expects you to wait until she feels like going out with you while receiving your undivided attention through text. 204 votes, 63 comments. However, he still continues to be bad at texting and recently went no contact for 5 days before popping back up saying “it’s been a while. It is now officially on them to reach out. Also, just because someone’s on their phone doesn’t mean they’re actively checking texts or even want to check texts. I just want someone close whom I can talk with. On the other hand, even the self-proclaimed "bad texters" initiated contacted frequently and rarely took hours to reply because they were just too happy to see my name on their phone screen. I am bad at texting as well - much more of a face to face communicator. She was also difficult to talk to on Bumble, so I wasn't worried. In the past year i have progress immensely and am now somewhat confident in an actual physical interaction, but the process of texting or messaging someone is always super scary for me. Don't double text just simply people say they double text and get a date, and don't hold on texting just because people say "double texting is a big turn-off" to women neither Bad texting is just a way of saying “you aren’t responding fast/often enough and not giving me the amount of attention i want”. But they never text back or take weeks to respond. I double text too sometimes, mostly at friends but yeah, don’t think it’s a bad thing at all. i suggest talking to her in person about it ! communication goes a long way 🤍 what has worked for me personally is : on IOS you are able to pin certain contacts at the top of the app. I know she likes texting but we're just both kind of introverts and aren't the best at conversing. There’s literally no way to answer this question, idk why ppl ask this on Reddit. On top of that, I'm introverted and have social anxiety. My opinion, above anyone that doesn’t respond within a day unless, you know, theft are traveling to the international space station or somewhere you know doesn’t have service. Let it go I did just that ,as I'm replying to this blog ,I'm on my way to deliver flowers to someone I just met . Personally, I'm notoriously bad at responding to text messages, because if I'm busy I'll look at the text, tell myself I'll get back to it later, but without that little notification symbol I'll forget the text ever existed. 6 years late but ill comment for anyone reading through this later. But I think adhd can contribute a lot to being a bad texter. With millennials and Gen Z, texting is almost required in order to get ahold of them. But I'm only speaking to my own experience and every case will be different. Their texting habits make it difficult to have meaningful communication. Multi-tasking can be difficult, so they’re putting down their current activity to text you back. I misspell a lot of stuff while texting for some reason. like to Don't text. Some days (not very often, but it has happened often enough that I feel that it's reasonable to be mad about it), he only manages to text me once. Country to popular reddit opinion, people like that do geniunely exist. Shes just bad at texting. Know who your texting. To me, wanting to text every day, and expecting to get to know me through messages rather than hanging out in the real world, are examples of "bad texting habits". I completely dislike this social construct of texting and dating. I'm so bad at texting/calling people back that I've lost touch with people that I wish I was still close with. Though as someone who's also a bad texter, I will say it generally becomes less of an issue once I'm in a relationship with a person. Yep, just once. We set up a second date last weekend, but she legitimately fucked up and was 2-hours late. Most people don't end a texting conversation because it'll be rude, but unless you're sure the girl is free and not doing work, texting her back and forth every minute will not only distract her from her work, but will also get her annoyed. Drives me crazy having to wait for the end of the 5-6 text train. You are bad at texting and if something seems like it has come across a bad way, you meant it in a good way. - Do people understand that if you are "bad at texting" or "take days to respond", the only person you will ever be with is someone who doesn't care what you have to say? Or they might be with someone who prefers to have communication in person mostly and don't need to be talking on the chat to feel valued. fmezmwwxnrnecpucivgagmuumuqxgxoukvktfpiqwlvojthvl